The Suicidal Octopus

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Ye Olde Sunken Treasure: Rants Archives

What would life be like if there was nothing to bitch about?

¤ May 5, 2018 ¤

♬ So much for abandoning social media…

This post pertains to: DepressionRantsThoughts

I’m still fucking addicted, I have an issue. I need to stop. Stop! I don’t need likes! I just want to share things with people I like. What’s wrong with me?

I miss talking nonsense about stories I’m creating that no one but me understands, why do I have to pretend I’m some kind of different person when I’m on social media? Why do I crave fucking internet lovelove points?

I want to update this blog more with my thoughts and feelings, maybe I will be less depressed when I’m able to express myself instead of continually holding it in and wanting to scream how depressed I am on social media.

I hate how I depend on social media for self-worth, and I hate that it’s consuming me. I hate that it’s needed in today’s world to promote yourself and get seen… I don’t know what to do.

♥ Posted at 6:36:16 pm CDT

¤ March 4, 2016 ¤

♬ Fuck this shit

This post pertains to: Rants

This bullshit is really pissing me off lately…

I have a form of eczema called dyshidrosis where little itchy blisters from on your hands and feet which become rashes and your skin hard, I guess? Shit’s SO fucking annoying. When I was a teenager it used to be really bad, where my skin would flake off and become raw to the point where I couldn’t touch anything with my fingers without burning pain and had to wear gloves to do anything. It’s gotten better but it;s still shitty so YEAH

Then there’s my fav condition called CDDD (cervical degenerative disk disease) which I got diagnosed with at 20 but have never been able to treat it because LOL ANYTHING INVOLVING MEDICAL SERVICE COSTS TOO MUCH MONEY…. so I’ve learned to live with and make accommodations for it, it fucking sucks changing your life to suit a god damn condition. Like fuck off, it’s my body not yours. Why do I have to change what I do to suit YOU? Get the fuck out of my spine you piece of shit. Anyway this disease causes the disks between my vertebrae to deteriorate, what this translates to is that any pressure on my spine causes me pain because there is little left of the disks to absorb the weight. This means I can’t sit up straight in chairs and small things like wear necklaces or shirts that are too close to my neck. So I spend my time slouching and it’s really embarrassing sometimes because general etiquette says that when you slouch you’re being rude, but like I LITERALLY CAN’T SIT UP OR ELSE I WILL BE IN PAIN. And I can’t really go “oh sorry I have X medical condition” every time I have to explain myself so like… idk it’s annoying sometimes even though I haven’t put any weight on my neck at all (slouching all day) my neck STILL decides to hurt.

Oh and I also have hyperhidrosis which makes you sweaty. ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Shaking hands? I can’t do that. Wearing any kind of closed shoe without socks is a potion to knock anyone out the moment I take my shoes off. Wearing light-coloured shirts that are too close to my armpits? yeah no. shit’s more wet than a fucking swamp in a minute.

fuck this shit. it could be worse but hey I’m not gonna get into a pissing contest about who has the worse conditions.

♥ Posted at 6:54:45 pm CDT

¤ October 21, 2015 ¤

♬ The End of an Era

This post pertains to: DepressionRants

I am quitting my job on the first of November. I can’t take it here any longer.

At first I was happy to have a chance to be an illustrator and build my portfolio for future opportunities in the illustration world. As time went by I became less of an illustrator and more of a personal lapdog. As it stands, I might’ve even become the new maid if I did not decide now to leave.

I’m now basically my boss’s personal servant. “Fix this clock. Find this thing. Call these people. Go through this folder. Find this. Mail this. Write this. Move this. List this. Sell this. Buy this. Package this.” I’m tired of being the little dog told to do these stupid menial tasks that I didn’t sign up for.

It wouldn’t be so bad if these tasks weren’t continuously complicated by my boss’s inability to provide any information about anything. My rage comes from the fact that any time my boss asks me to do something, 99% of the time I’m not given any information on the subject and I have to send 50 back and forth emails trying to figure out what the fuck I’m doing, what is going on, what I need to continue. Most, if not all, of these tasks could be accomplished by him in half the time it took for me to do it because he is the one with all the information to do it.

Earlier in the week I was told to call Aflac about getting a refund. I knew I wasn’t getting anywhere, but I might as well call. I did, and to no one’s surprise, I couldn’t get anywhere because I wasn’t the policyholder. so my boss asked me to set up a 3 way call for him. It was stupid. My only point in the three way call would be to get past the automated messaging system and get to a real person. So I just called from the phone in his office instead and handed him the phone when I got to a real person. what was the point of that? Me being there to spend all 1 minute pressing the right buttons to get to a real person?

There are so many stupid menial tasks that become complex issues that take days to solve, and would’ve taken literal minutes if he did it himself. It’s infuriating, I do not need this, and it isn’t worth driving here every day for a fucking hour and a half and back to get paid less than what my mom makes as a secretary. Basically doing the same clerical shit I am.

I am not giving a two weeks notice, only one. I’m going to send my resignation letter tomorrow and after that will be my last day here.

Help me god.

♥ Posted at 11:23:09 am CDT

¤ May 7, 2015 ¤

♬ Dumbness intensifies

This post pertains to: ComicRantsThoughts

Today someone on Tapastic posted a less than happy comment. Some people have said it was rude or unfriendly, but I just think that they don’t understand the story. I was a little crushed at first but after I got over it I thought it was funny.

I was so excited in the beginning of this series to read the story, because it seemed interesting and the artwork is beautiful and now I’m so disappointed because the protagonist seems so dumb.

We are talking about a seventeen-year-old girl who has never been outside without supervision, and has spent most of her life thriving on fairytales, storybooks and historical anecdotes of how amazing, awesome, chivalric and respected House Vermillion was. The audience doesn’t know this yet so I understand they might confuse idealistic naivety with “dumb.” However, let’s see what kind of “dumb” things E-chan has been up to in the past two chapters:

  • Bluffed magic she didn’t know to attempt to diffuse a fight
  • Used a mechanism she learned about only minutes before to disable her attacker and escape
  • Possesses knowledge of plants in the forest. Most people can’t identify anything past poison ivy
  • Successfully evade two paladins, one with force and one by using her surrounding
  • Start a fire to distract another paladin, using only sticks, oil, and a steel brooch

I would mention being a chemist, but I’ve made a bit of a mistake and only used that as telling instead of showing, so it doesn’t count. That being said, she sure does a lot of dumb things, doesn’t she?

I have a bit of a thought in my mind that this person is also of the same mentality of the people of Gaia who ask, “Why did her hair get cut off?” All the evidence is right there on your screen. If you used your head a little bit maybe you would see she is not as dumb as you think. Idealistic. Young. Not the smartest crayon in the box. Yes, but not dumb.

♥ Posted at 11:55:38 am CDT