The Suicidal Octopus

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Ye Olde Sunken Treasure: Art Archives

You’d think otherwise…

¤ January 15, 2018 ¤

♬ A comeback

This post pertains to: ArtDepression

It’s been a long three years since I started my comic. As you can see, I abandoned this blog in favour of social media, so I could build an audience for my comic. But I think that was a mistake.

As I kept posting more and more, I became more greedy for the validation of strangers. I craved likes, comments, all that bullshit, as if it were my only sustenance. But I could never really get a foothold anywhere in the art world. I made acquaintances, I liked things I saw on my timeline, they liked some of my things.

However, it all hit me today. I had entered the fanart contest for a game I’m playing. I spent a long time on it and it’s one of like, three pieces of 2017 that I could say I was proud of. I thought I was finally getting somewhere with my art goals.

As you might’ve guessed I didn’t get picked as one of the winners and I was pretty bummed. After some other bad events happened I came to a realization. It wasn’t the fanart contest itself, but I realized the actual problem:

I am not that good. Actually, I am bad.

The reason I can’t gain a foothold anywhere is because I am bad. I am bad as a person and bad at art. My art is not attractive to anyone. I keep telling myself to learn an attractive anime style so people would like my art more and be more receptive to it but no matter what I do it never comes out looking like I want.

I’m just bad.

Therefore, I’m closing off my social media posting to return to this blog once again, to all 2 people who know it exists. I don’t have to worry about comments or likes or shit like that here, I can just share my work and not have to yearn for hearts from strangers. I’m tired of being shackled to fake internet lovelove points. Why can’t I be bad and just not have to feel bad for being bad? All I want to do is just make anime waifus and husbandous.

I’ve caught up to the current year and have uploaded all the stuff I missed, so the rest of 2016/2017 should be filled.

I’ll continue my bad art journey away from prying eyes. I’ll also be posting a summary of the things that’ve happened since I stopped posting here. This site is several years old and it’s got a lot of fucked up design choices on it, maybe I’ll revisit it and build it from a template like a normal person.

♥ Posted at 5:25:54 pm CDT

¤ January 28, 2016 ¤

♬ M-a-n-g-u-s

This post pertains to: ArtComic

Magnus has been through a lot of designing. I have always had difficulty drawing his head at different angles because I made the front view of his head LITERALLY SQUARE. So in different angles I freaked out because the shape of his face was no longer the same!


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♥ Posted at 5:42:44 pm CDT

¤ September 3, 2015 ¤

♬ The first con preparation

This post pertains to: ArtComic

So I’ve officially decided to get a booth at CAKE next year, though if I’ll ever get in that is the question because I don’t know when they open applications. Nonetheless I have been prepping myself for various con-related things. There are a lot of expenses and I don’t think I’ll break even, but everyone always says your first cons are about promotion and not about money. I have a lot on my to do list…

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♥ Posted at 5:56:36 pm CDT

¤ August 8, 2015 ¤

♬ かわいいですね?

This post pertains to: ArtComicThoughts

I might have stretched the truth a bit in my latest Q&A response.

Yeah, it’s true that I considered a realistic style in the fetal stage of my comic, and yes I am very inspired by Meduka Meguca.

However, it was never once in my mind that my comic was cute. I did not actually intend it to look like that. I did not associate my style with “cute.” It was just “cartoon.” When people started saying that it was ‘cute,’ I was really confused. “It’s cute? It’s just a cartoony look.”

Eventually I just kind of rolled with it. “Yep, it’s a story about a cute girl.” I guess it just happened that way. I now kinda facetiously advertise it as such.

♥ Posted at 10:03:26 am CDT